Battles.

Jennifer, one of the babies of Zirobwe

This has been one of those weeks that's just impossible to sum up in a blog post... Well, really, it'd be hard to sum up in any way at all, but for you all, I guess I'll try!

On Saturday evening, I had the opportunity to go with the team to Watoto church here in Kampala. The thing that hit me the most came from Exodus 14:14. It says "The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still." I feel like I've been fighting battles all week. First of all, we had over half of our team leave to go home on Monday, so we've all been adjusting to a smaller group. But most of the struggle was due to hearing about my community back home going through a rough time. After learning at the beginning of the week that a beautiful lady in our church who had been fighting cancer was doing badly, my heart was divided between here and home. All of my prayers and thoughts were back at home, but I also had to be present here. On Thursday morning when I heard of her passing, I honestly didn't know how to handle it... (really, I still don't), but it has been one of the hardest struggles to be here when I know my whole spiritual family back in Kansas is mourning. After being so prayerfully and emotionally invested in this woman's struggle, I've felt as if I were a part of the battle. But God has called me to let Him fight the battle; part of me wants to keep my battles in my own hands, so I can feel somewhat in control. The truth is - I can't control them. I've had to give the battle I was fighting for her up to God and trust Him with it, and He's had to remind me that understanding something and accepting something are two different things. I won't lie and tell you that I've accepted it yet, because I haven't quite been able to do that yet. But I can tell you that I'm living on in hope from past experiences that struggle brings growth, and in the end, growth in Christ is worth struggling for.

The inside of the church

The roof of the church is finally on!

On a different note, progress on the church building in Zirobwe is coming along! The roof is now on and the next step is buying doors and windows. EAC is asking people to donate money to help with this next step of the project (which you can contact me about if you have more questions). But it's so exciting to see the progress both in the church building and the people of Zirobwe themselves, even in the short time I've been here.

Nothing is impossible for God.



Blessings!

Renewed

"Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day."

2 Corinthians 4:16

This week has been one of rest, refreshment, and renewal. Although, at first I wasn't really that excited for it. Almost all of the staff had plans to leave for Kenya on Thursday evening to attend a wedding, so we didn't have the opportunity to go to Zirobwe. After connecting with the kids there so much last week, it was a struggle not to be slightly grumpy about not going. However, as often seems to happen, God got a hold of my attention. He brought to light the fact that recently I'd been kinda skimping on my time with Him. Don't get me wrong, I'd still take some time out of my day to read the word and study, but it had been a long time since I simply went and sat before Him. So, this week I was simply blessed in dwelling in His presence.

One thing that stuck out the most came from Ephesians 4,

 "You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created to be like God in true righteousness."

Day by day, God promises to renew us. We can be made new in Christ; we are being made new. I don't have to be weighed down by my old self, because I have the option to run to my Father and lay it before Him. This is what He has to say in Isaiah 43:18-19,

"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland."

God is my source of renewal. "Coincidentally," the first song that came on as I was preparing to write this post was "Made New" by Aaron Pelsue. It says, "I am made new; I am made clean. You have lifted all my burdens and the shame that buries me. I am made new; I am made free. You broke the chains that kept me bound. The curse of sin can't hold me down. By the power that raised you, I am made new." 

Now a quick rundown of the week: Monday we went to the babies home and helped out there. Tuesday we went to Jaja's Orphanage and had then had the opportunity to do a program with the neighbor kids that evening. They are so bright! It was a blast to hang around with them, feed them, and play games with them. It's something we definitely want to keep doing in the future. Wednesday we went to the children's hospital, Katalemwa, once more, and on Thursday we helped out at the babies home again. Yesterday and today we've had "days of rest," which prove great for team bonding, movie nights, and getting some stuff done at least. But it's definitely been a blessing! God is good!!

Blessings! 

Shine Your Light to God

I was sitting around a campfire out under the stars of Zirobwe with a young boy on my lap simply enjoying the fellowship of our small "weekend" team in the village and a nearby family, when something beautiful happened. The boy on my lap, Joseph, was playing around with my "headlamp," shining it in people's eyes and everywhere (just your typical boy), when he suddenly stopped and shone the light straight up. I asked him if he was shining it at the tree above us or if he was shining it to God. So he moved it slightly left straight towards the sky towards his Father above - he was shining his little light right to God. I've learned a lot about faith this week, about having faith like a child - faith like Joseph when he shone his light to God.

Working on the ground with
the church roof going on behind!

On Monday and Tuesday we did some of our typical projects in Kampala, but on Wednesday we got to leave for Zirobwe! I was SO excited, however, my excitement was short lived. When we got to the village, one of my little girls, Winnie, was sick. She had a burning fever, a terrible cough, wheezing, and was just all together devoid of energy (she's normally a very ornery one!). I was really worried about her. The next day, she was better in the morning, but by evening time she was even worse. I finally just had to give it up to God, I acknowledged to Him that I was at an end, that my faith was weak - I couldn't take care of her, but He is the Healer. Just as He did in Luke 7 when the centurion said to Christ, "But say the word, and my servant will be healed" (Luke 7:7b), I knew He could do the same thing for Winnie. So, after laying it before Him, I could at least go to sleep in peace, knowing that He had Winnie in His hands. The next day, Winnie came to camp happy and healthy as ever! Praise God, Mukama Yebazibwe! My girl was smiling and shining again.

With my girl, Winnie! (She's obviously feeling better!

I think through that experience I got a little taste of how God feels when we're living our lives as the light He calls us to be. In Matthew 5:14 & 16, Christ explains, "You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden...In the same way, let your light shine before others, that they may see your good deeds and glorify your Father in heaven." God wants us to shine for Him and to Him, but when we're sick in our relationship with Him, when we've taken in the lies Satan feeds us and forgotten what He's blessed us with and why, we fail to shine. When we don't trust Him and don't believe that He can do what He says, we're living as a sick, broken child. When we're living like that, He will do anything to heal us and bring us back to Himself. He desires us to live as His healthy, shining children not only for His pleasure, but also so His light can shine through us into the darkness.

You know what else? It's okay to admit to God that my faith is weak, because He already completely knows me and loves me in spite of that. It's okay to say, "I do believe; help me with my unbelief!" (Mark 9:24). Sometimes that's exactly what I feel like, but God can overcome my unbelief.

We made airplanes on Saturday. What a blast!

Switching moods now to what we actually did in Zirobwe: The church ground is making rapid success. We leveled the ground and planted grass on Wednesday and Thursday. The roof of the church is also, through prayer and God's provision, quickly coming up. On top of the normal stay of 3 days in the village, some of us stayed on until Sunday (today!). We helped more with planting and did a children's program on Friday, and on Saturday we held a sports day for the kids. We played games, sang, and acted out the story of Joshua with the kids and just had a great day all together. In the evenings we would sit around the campfire with a nearby family and relax together. It was an awesome time of rest and learning for me, and I was definitely blessed by the stay there.

I guess I've probably written enough to bore you by now, so I'll sign off. God bless, and always shine your light to God.

Blessings!

"My Power is Made Perfect in Weakness"

Oh, where to start?! I guess the beginning of the week is as good a place as any. On Monday several of the girls left. Three of them came the same day I did, and two had come the week after I arrived. It was definitely hard to say goodbye to these girls who had become my sisters over the month we spent here together. But as they left, we all had to be reminded, "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens..." (Ecclesiastes 3:1). The weeks they had here were specifically laid out and planned for them by the Almighty God, and obviously He knows what He's doing!

The next three days were probably the most physically challenging I've had since I've been here (although slashing grass might tie). During our days in Zirobwe this week, we had the opportunity to help build mud huts as well as have our children's program in the evening. Each day we worked on the huts in some way - carrying water, carrying bricks, mixing mud, or actually putting mud on the structure. (You have no clue what I would have done for a Bobcat!) We were all so physically tired, but we were in it together. In a way, it reminded me of Cross Country. You grow together as a team because you know that everyone is going through the same pain and struggle you are. "Coincidentally," before we left for the village, I was reading in 2 Corinthians 12, "But He said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.' Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." I was continually reminded while I was carrying water and bricks that my strength comes from God. As small as it might sound, there's NO way I could have carried all those bricks and jerrycans full of water out of my own strength and still be able to go with full strength to the children's programs or whatever else we had to do that day. I'm so thankful that I have a God who is my strength.

The inside

The hut structure

With the girls ready to work!

Making progress!

Almost done!

On Friday we had the opportunity to go to a secondary school in a nearby village to help put on a conference with a group called YouthQuake. It was an amazing opportunity. The YouthQuake team was so fun to work with, and we were able to break up into "small" groups with the kids to talk about real life issues. I ended up being with the team that went with the Senior 2 class. (S-2 is similar to middle school in the States). After some brief introduction, we opened up for questions, and they had so many!! It was amazing to be able to pour into those kids where they were at in life. Some of the questions asked you would have heard just about anywhere in the world - America or Uganda - the kids still have the same questions about life. But then, there are some questions that bring the reality of these students' lives into the light. One question that came at the very end spoke about a student's struggle to keep up her grades and abuse from her father. She was sponsored, but if her grades weren't good for her second term report, they threatened to take away her sponsorship. She simply wanted to know what to do. We didn't have time to answer her question, but honestly, how would you answer it? Trusting God takes on a whole new aspect here; you actually have to trust and fully depend on Him. It was a very humbling and eye-opening experience.

So, yes, it's been a hard, long week, but it's been amazing and God is still moving. Amen!





Blessings!

I Need a BIG God!

This week has been CRAZY! And honestly, I don't have a nice little theme that neatly packages the events of this week together - not even close. However, even as I write this, I realize that it's a positive thing. It reminds me that our God doesn't fit in a tidy little package - thank goodness!! I absolutely need a big God (even if sometimes I refuse to admit that fact).

At the end of last week, the plan was for me to join a church group that I went to orientation with and spend Sunday through Thursday with them in Zirobwe. I was SO excited, but during some of my personal time with God and our devotions, I realized that God wasn't calling me there. I just couldn't feel at peace about it (which is crazy knowing how much I wanted to go), but ultimately, I want to be where God wants me, not where I want to be. So, I ended up staying here in Kampala while one of my sisters filled in for me in Zirobwe, and of course, it was a great week!! God continually reminded me:

"I took you from the ends of the earth,

from its farthest corners I called you.

I said, 'You are my servant';

I have chosen you and have not rejected you.

So do not fear, for I am with you;

do not be dismayed, for I am your God.

I will strengthen you and help you;

I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."

Isaiah 41:9-10

Whether it was making Oreo balls late at night, eating and worshiping without power, or going on coffee shop dates, I've realized how blessed I've been by my family here, and I feel like our team grew together a lot this week. We realized that God called each of us here as His servants at this specific place and this specific time for a reason. He purposed it for us, and I've learned so much about unity in the body of Christ just through this week. I've never had the opportunity before to be a part of such a big group of girls, and it's been a blast! 

The girls and our Oreo balls! (Round1)

Jen & I after our coffee date!

The girls making Oreo balls.

At New Brainstorm Primary School

Another part of this week was just plain hard. On Thursday we went to one of the babies' homes. A couple weeks ago I had fed a tiny little girl named Beatrice, and the week after that she had been put in the hospital, so we went to go visit her. This week we learned that Beatrice had passed away from malnutrition. We had guessed her age to be about 2, judging by size. She was 4. Talk about a slap in the face. Even here, that's not something I see every day, but knowing Beatrice, I've realized that it happens every day. Honestly, I'm not sure how to handle it. I wish I could take care of all the hurting people in the world, but I can't. Thankfully, I believe in a big God who can.

One final part about this week before I wrap this up. We got to have a Fun Day with the EAC sponsorship kids on Saturday. We played games, laughed, competed, ate, and all around had a blast! I think the biggest thing that stuck out to me was the overwhelming feeling that there is hope for the kids here! To see those children so happy, healthy, and joyful despite their hard backgrounds was inspiring. Our God is a big and awesome God!

Blessings! 

Crucified With Christ

"I have been crucified with Christ: it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. The life which I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me."

-Galatians 2:20

My little friend, Betty, and I at Sunday School.

Kids in Zirobwe

This has been my theme verse during the week. Over the end of last week and the beginning of this week, I simply wanted to be back in Zirobwe. It was hard to be in Kampala because I felt like my heart and spirit were still in the village. But God (as always) had something to teach me through it! I was reading yesterday in 2 Corinthians 5 when Paul talks about being away from our Father, and I realized that I'm never going to be absolutely and completely satisfied in this body on earth because I will always long to be at home with my Lord. Seeing that longing exemplified and magnified in my life was a very humbling and unique experience. It made me ask, does my longing for Christ look like that? Is it something that's continually at the forefront of my mind? Thankfully, my desire to be in Zirobwe was soon fulfilled. We got to stay there Tuesday through Thursday once again! Although we only had one program with the kids we're normally with, it was a wonderful three days. On Wednesday we had the opportunity to spend all day at one of the secondary schools - we played soccer and volleyball with them as well as having sessions on how to write a story and career guidance. One particular instance sticks out clearly in my mind: we were sitting in small groups doing career guidance, and one boy spoke up and asked, "What if, once you've gone through all your classes and are ready to enter university, your parents tell you one morning that there's no longer enough money left and you can't attend university?" It broke my heart. Back home it seems like almost everyone has the opportunity to go to a college or university; in fact, it's expected. But the young adults here go through primary and secondary school simply hoping they'll be able to further their education. The students in the village especially - they have such big dreams - to be a doctor, a lawyer, engineer, singer - but when it comes down to it, most of them won't even have the opportunity to attempt their dreams because they won't be able to attend university. It just makes me realize how blessed we are in America - and also how much we take for granted. On Thursday we slashed grass early in the morning and then had the opportunity to plant trees along the entrance to Empower a Child's future Training Center. I really felt God guiding me to choose what looked like the weakest tree. He reminded me, "I chose you when you felt like the weakest one." So, in short, I'm looking forward to seeing my namesake tree grow and mature as the vision of EAC grows as well.

Kids in Zirobwe

Another thing about this week that sticks out is the idea of being weak, broken, and being a jar of clay. Honestly, I was tired this week (especially after slashing grass!). But I was also just hurting for the kids in Zirobwe. That feeling put a whole new perspective on being "crucified with Christ." It means I'm no longer able to live for myself; I cry for, hurt for, pray for, and am "crucified" for those He loves as well. I think 2 Corinthians 4:16 says it best, "Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day." On the outside I'm a jar of clay, but inside I hold the promise of God to His glory. Amen and amen! 

Brokenly Whole

Bogere, one of the boys from Zirobwe enjoying his balloon!

This week has been yet another beautiful span of time in the Pearl of Africa. Early in the week, I had the privilege to Skype some of my best friends, family, and some of the kids in our church all at once. It was such a blessing to hear their laughs and see their smiles. However, the biggest thing that's happened this week was finally getting to stay in the village of Zirobwe.

We left Tuesday morning with three vans of volunteers, bags, and supplies. After setting up camp, we split up into two teams and went to different sides of the village to put on a program. I was lucky enough to go to the same area where we do our Sunday School, so I got to see many of my little friends from Sunday. We also did feeding programs and went to visit a local high school during our time there. There were always kids around to play with and love on, and despite the fact that we had to carry water everyday, sleep in tents, and   wear bug spray and sun screen everywhere (without getting to shower), I loved it there!

The team at the future church building in Zirobwe.

One morning as I was reading in 1 Corinthians, God made me realize in a new way the power of love, "And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love" (1 Corinthians 13:13). As I was in Zirobwe, I witnessed an outpouring of love from God, my family here, and myself. I realized that, if nothing else, the most powerful thing you can do for the people and children here is love them. I've also learned through the course of several months that loving people is a choice; it's not about your feelings. We have to show these people love through our actions. While loving the children has been relatively easy for me through the love of Christ, loving them also opens my heart for them. Every time I see a child with clothes that are completely torn apart or young ones carrying around a younger sibling with them, my heart breaks. It pains me to see them in such need, but they're always so joyful. I honestly didn't want to leave. I'm just in love with seeing God work there, the children there, and everything about Zirobwe (well, minus the sharp seeds that stick to everything!). Being there humbled me, opened my heart and my eyes, and made me truly depend on Him. That's the kind of life I want to live, and leaving there broke my heart, but at the same time I'm so full! Even though I'm sad because I can't be there right now, I'm comforted because my Savior will always be there for those people. Even though I'm broken because there is so much sickness and pain, I'm at peace because I know that the Divine Healer is in that place. God calls us to, "Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts..." (Colossians 3:15a). I'm continually learning what that means. Mukama Yebazibwe! Praise God!

Blessings!


(Credit to the Honorable Cassie Wilson for the title and team picture in this post!)